Where are we going wrong with our young?

Many of us are asking the question "What's going on with our kids".  Its been widely reported in the UK Media that our black boys need role models, this is being championed as the answer to the problem of our black youth falling into a life of crime.

Although good role models will have some positive effects, it is by know means the answer to the current problem.  Parenting from both mother and father and discipline, coupled with the gradual erosion of our village mentality are in my opinion the things we need to work at and reverse.

The black family has been told for many years how we should bring up our children, what forms of discipline work and that to smack is wrong.  We do not advocate abuse however we do champion the right of choice, and believe that parents should have the right to use smacking as a form of discipline.  We have been told for years that we need to conform to the English societies view of parenting.

Unfortunately the English view of parenting is not the black way.

Here lies the problem.  Through out history Black families have gained their strength through the extended family.  Uncles, aunties and cousins, all as far as a parent is concerned had the right to pull up a child if he or she was doing wrong.  This helped parents instil discipline.  Children new if they were seen on the street being disrespectful or up to know good, that could mean the Rod (a biblical term) is waiting for them when they got home.

This gave children what is called a healthy fear.  Fear is not always a bad thing especially if it stops you from doing wrong. 

Parents are afraid to discipline, teachers do not understand our youth therefore find it easier to exclude rather than work with the child.  The result is groups of kids walking the street forming there own families (GANGS) they design their own form of respect (GANG Code)

Role Models will help as will positive images on TV etc.. but our parents need to start disciplining there children, black men need to play their parts in the upbringing of their children, also it's important for us to show interest in nieces and nephews, the extended family.

Stats show that up to 70% of our children are being brought up by one parent which in most cases is the mother.  We may not be able to live together but we can change that stat if the men step up and assume their fatherly responsibility, too many men seem to think that a relationship break-up absolves them of being a parent and they move on and start another family until that relationship breaks-up.  This cycle must stop!  

Children need to go back to referring to there parents as mum or dad, elders as uncle or aunty. All of these things are small but significant changes which instil respect and discipline and arm them with the right mental tools to stay away from the influence of the street.